Translator: Renkun27, chiangyushien
Ke Bu was lazily lying on his bed. He did not want to get up yet. Although it was Sunday, still, there was nothing near the school to amuse himself with. He also did not want to take a one-hour bus ride going to the city. He only stayed at home in the dormitory, so that he became mildewed. The sound of Chu Haoyu tapping nonstop on the keyboard filled the entire bedroom. Gong Zhu, who was dressed brightly and neatly, came and visited this lifeless dormitory room. As soon as he walked in, he frowned: “Your room’s so dark. If you don’t want to draw back the curtains, at least turn on the lights, okay?”
“Oh, Princess, you got up so early.” It was not a good thing to call Gong Zhu a princess, whether from appearance or character.
“Still early, Ke Bu?”
Chu Haoyu raised his chin. Gong Zhu had his sights on the one rolled like a ball in a quilt on the bed. The rolled-up quilt only revealed a foot, just like an attempted murder crime scene.
“Ke Bu, are you still sleeping?”
“I’m not asleep, I just don’t want to get up.”
Chu Haoyu said with disdain: “Although you’re considered as a man, you can’t be as manly as me and Xiujie. Still, you should at least make an effort to also face Gong Zhu, right? You have too little desire to do better as a man.”
Ke Bu was said to be superficial. From the bed, he sat up, rubbing his shoulders: “That, I’m so sorry. I’m allergic to living in a fairy tale world.”
“If you go on like this, don’t say women don’t want you. Men don’t want you, too.”
“I have no need for that. Is it possible that you’re thinking that I would pursue someone; as soon as I go out, the little birds and animals are all around me happily singing; we happily spend every day in the woods, and then, when I have difficulties, the little birds and animals would come help me; finally, I was choked to death by an apple; someone will drool on me to save my life? Stop dreaming.”
“Gee, you’re the least interesting person I’ve ever met. You could go as far as twisting a fairy tale into this way. I made up my mind, you’re the type of person that definitely needs to be included in the blacklist of finding a lover.”
“Then I really want to stand in for those women to release them and I’ll save them.”
“Your life is now considered over. If you were a woman, even if it’s the end of the world, I would rather choose to kill myself. Princess, you might as well as spend less time with Ke Bu. He’s so bad.”
Gong Zhu tilted his head, catching this dialogue’s main point: “Haoyu, if it was me and Ke Bu, who would you choose?”
“It would definitely be you.”
“Even if it’s you, simply saying it is also attacking me!!” Ke Bu sat up from his bed, took out his toothbrush and squeezed some toothpaste.
Chu Haoyu seemed to be thinking of something devious in his boring life: “It’s better to compare the two of you, right? Let Ke Bu know how big the gap is between men, to save his hopeless heart.”
“I give up.” Ke Bu scratched his stomach, spitted out the foam in his mouth, and did not have a bit of a competitive heart.
“It’s not fun giving up so quickly. Let’s go to the gym. I’ll call on everybody to come. Sunday’s boring anyway.”
“I’m not interested to join at all.”
“Why, are you afraid to lose?” Chu Haoyu goaded.
“Yes, that’s it.” Ke Bu remained a bit unmoved. He turned around and asked Gong Zhu: “Do you want to go crazy with him?”
Gong Zhu earnestly nodded: “I don’t really know why he wanted to compare me and you.”
“There’s nothing to compare.”
“Just think of comparing me and you in others’ eyes.” He looked at Gong Zhu’s attractively-adorable little face. Ke Bu had no way out, he was finally dragged by Chu Haoyu to the gym. In addition to a few of them, some of the students were playing basketball.
Chu Haoyu clapped his hands, attracting everyone’s attention: “Excuse me, fellow students, we are freshmen students. Because we want to choose between these two as a cadre, in order to comply with public opinion, I’d like to ask for your help to vote.” Chu Haoyu truly dared to let out lies. He spoke forcefully and with justice . All of those ten people that were playing basketball gathered around. There was a stroll-in-the-zoo kind of look in their eyes as they looked at Ke Bu and Gong Zhu. Ke Bu’s face was quite repulsive. Why did he have to be dragged into this kind of nonsense? He did not want to be compared with anyone. He knew how ordinary he was, as ordinary as instant noodles in the supermarket everywhere—cheap and common.
(「振振有词」zhènzhèn-yǒucí – an idiom which meant “to argue with the courage of one’s convictions”)
Zhi Li took the basketball with one hand — the skillful dribble, the beautiful take-off, the ball flew from his slender fingers in an arc simply to fall into the hoop. He did not seem to notice anything; just a person who was playing with a ball. Perhaps from the beginning, he was not prepared to participate in it. He just wanted to play ball, nothing more. Contrary to expectations, the value of his vote for Gong Zhu was significant.
“Than what? Is it better than anyone who punches each other? Count me in as well.” Ying Xiujie actively participated in it.
“What stands in front of you is the much-anticipated No. 1 and the less-prominent No. 2. First of all, evaluate them based on their looks. Please vote everyone.” Chu Haoyu ignored Ying Xiujie and continued speaking.
“Yu Tai, if you want to fight, just say it!!” Ke Bu could not help rolling his eyes because of the wording.
“Contestants, please keep quiet.”
“Contestant number 1.” The most realistic answer is that everyone had chosen Gong Zhu. As a matter of fact, this could not be blamed on the others. Ke Bu himself would choose Gong Zhu. This outrageous xiaoshou’s name was clearly called out for.
“Next is temperament.”
“Contestant number 1.”
“Then next is moral character.”
“Contestant number 1.”
“Then the next is self-cultivation, attire. Contestants, please walk around the judges one time, then pose a few more.”
“I’ll put a knife on your neck believe it or not.” This extremely senseless evaluation actually consumed an hour. In other words, Ke Bu was fully attacked for an hour. He feebly looked at the time. This should be the time to eat.
“The last question, combined with the results above, between the two, who has more manly charisma?”
“Contestant number 1.”
“I say, to the few of you, all of my friends, you at least have to give me a vote, right?”
“We don’t have a distorted view. All are based on the facts. So take this opportunity to properly turn over a new leaf. Don’t blame us. We also just want to make you into an outstanding man soon whose able to get into a woman’s eyes. That will be enough.”
“Zhi Li, you also came to vote, right?” Chu Haoyu also considered to hit the mark by a fluke . This time, Gong Zhu was actually a little nervous.
(「歪打正着」wāidǎ-zhèngzháo – an idiom which meant “to score a lucky hit.”)
“Gong Zhu, I suppose.” Zhi Li casually answered. Everyone could see that this made Gong Zhu jump for joy, while on the other hand, Ke Bu just wanted to eat. He did not care about who Zhi Li chose. He was just so hungry so that he had a stomachache.
“By popular demand, no matter what, the champion will have to treat us a bowl of noodles.” Everyone swarmed Gong Zhu, pushing him to the canteen. Ke Bu walked outside the door and saw Su Youyan. To be honest, although he did not want to be compared with others, regarding losing so miserably to Gong Zhu, more or less, there was still a knot in his heart. Now, he really wanted to hug Su Youyan and have a good cry, but he could not move because his stomach was aching. Eat. He must eat.
“That’s not going to happen. Yu Tai and the others just love to have fun, that’s all. I’m also not stupid enough to not distinguish between jokes and malicious pranks, alas, I just didn’t expect losing so miserably. I really shouldn’t be compared with Gong Zhu. He’s an outstanding person in every way. In fact, I understand it in my heart. But I certainly can’t always be somebody better than me, the most ordinary person in this world. I have a sense of security in it.” Ke Bu frankly spoke out what was in his mind.
“Well, you didn’t entirely lose yet. It depends on how you ask the question.” Su Youyan suddenly raised her voice, and a lonely reply drifted in the vacant gym: “Zhi Li.” Zhi Li looked at Su Youyan. Ke Bu was just outside the door so that Zhi Li could not see him.
“Between Ke Bu and Gong Zhu, who’s more good looking?”
Ke Bu knew that if it came out from Zhi Li’s mouth, it was definitely the truth.
“Who has more class?”
“Who has the best virtue?”
Ke Bu whispered beside Su Youyan: “Do you absolutely want to force me to willingly commit suicide?”
Su Youyan indifferently pushed her eyeglasses: “To make things clear, I don’t treat you as a friend. It’s just that the last time, I owe you the corn. After this, don’t try to be friendly with me.”
“If this is called a favor, please keep it.” This kind of friend only existed to betray you!
This time, Su Youyan did not answer Ke Bu. She just continued asking Zhi Li: “Then if Ke Bu and Gong Zhu were women, who will you choose as a girlfriend?”
Zhi Li once again easily threw the ball beautifully into the basket. The ball fell to the floor and made a sharp and clear noise, shaking up the atmosphere: “Ke Bu.” Zhi Li said without any hesitations. Ke Bu’s name was practically blurted out.
Ke Bu turned his hand pressing against Su Youyan’s back: “Ask why. If you won’t ask, Laozi will stab you to death.” It seemed that friends really do come to betray. Not only did he turn against a friend, Su Youyan, Ke Bu was even so evil.
“I’m more familiar with Ke Bu.”
This is such a lousy answer!! No, since I’m not satisfied with this answer, then what kind of answer do I want to hear? This world was abnormal. His head was also abnormal. Ke Bu shook his head and headed toward the canteen.
Ying Xiujie was holding his meal: “You’re so slow. Aren’t you hungry?”
“I’m not particularly hungry yet.”
Huh?! Ke Bu reached out his hand to touch his stomach, where did the pain disappear to…